I’m on the way of loosing weight… Again

Hello, is anybody still there?

It is a classical story about a girl. The girl decide to start loosing weight. She loose nine kilograms but than she stop the diet and start to get fat. That’s my story.

Now, after a year, I want to try it again. And I’m not alone. I have a special therapist about that. But step by step.

I have a problem with my weight since I was small. (If I was Chuck Norris I would say, the weight has a problem with me. But I’m not.) Last time I was slim in six years, I think. Than I was a little curvy girl but just a little. I started to get fat in fifteen years I think. I don’t know why I started to eat too much. Maybe because from my fourteen I had a depression. Maybe because I was bullied by the class teacher. Maybe because I had simplier way to get sweatnesses. Maybe every one reason.

Anyway, I got an addiction of the combination of sugar and fat and that was deeper and deeper. Yeah, I’m like a junkie, I need my shot. Every fucking day. Every fucking moment.

After my highschool I have eaten more and more (sugar and fat). Lately I moved from my parent’s house and the sugar was more available. And lately I cured of my depression but the addiction I already had. And it was worse.

In my life, I tried some diets. First, when I was seventeen. It wasn’t healthy. I had ninty five kilograms and I loose weight to seventy kilograms. But I didn’t eat. I counted kolojouls. But I didn’t solv protein and sugar or fat… I had not much nutrients. My head hurt, I was weak and tired. I didn’t eat more than 5000 kj but this is a absolut minimum everyone has to eat.

Some time I had i weight seventy kilograms but than I started to eat and to get fatter again. After all, I had ninty or ninty five kilograms. It held a few years. But than I started to cure my depression. And I was… ups, one hundred twenty six kilograms.

I started to try “miracle” diets. Everythings was funkcional just a few weeks. I loose weight, I got fatter… and again. And again.

At the start of this year, I started to visit loosing weigh courses. In these courses we learned about how to eat healthy. It’s no “miracle” diet, no coctails or magic pills, it’s about having all nutrients and enough moving.

But the course ended. And I’m back in the start because my addiction is strong. Luckily I can still visit the therapist from these courses. She gives me privat lessons.

And this is what I want to write about. About my progress of loosing weight. And I believe this way will be successful because the way of loosing weight my therapist propagates is reasonable and mild.

My first task is: One evening in the week don’t eat sweatnesses. It seams to be easy but for someone who is addicted is not.

So tonight I’m crazy, eat too much watermelon and drink coffee to chase the desire away. I tried about this yesterday and the day before but I failed. I believe, tonight I can do it. But it’s pretty bad.

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